Dear Mother:
Happy belated Mother’s Day
(I spent yesterday travelling, so this is coming a day late.)
The most recent episode of Cautionary Tales looks at the history of Mother’s Day. It tells the story of Anna Marie Jarvis. Jarvis wanted to establish a national holiday to honor the dedication and sacrifice of America’s mothers. According to show host Tim Hartford, she wasn’t the first person to propose a Mother’s Day, “but her campaign caught the imagination of the people and the ears of the politicians.”
She fought to get a national holiday established by getting a variety of groups to come in and support the holiday.
One of her biggest supporters were the florists. You see, Jarvis, as a way to honour her mother specifically and mothers in general, would hand out white carnations, her mother’s favourite flower. They were simple, inexpensive and beautiful.
But as the idea of giving moms carnations caught on, the price of carnations would spike around Mother’s Day.
The whole story is kind of sad, with Jarvis ultimately leading a campaign to abolish Mother’s Day, and how what she saw as a simple act of honouring mothers had been co-opted by the industrial holiday complex. Not just florists, but card makers and restaurants offering Mother’s Day specials.
In one of her most famous protests, she walked into the Tea Room at her local department store, ordered the Mother’s Day salad, and then, when it came, she dumped it on the floor, paid for it, and walked out.
And yes, mothers’ day is definitely a commercial holiday. Last year, spending hit nearly $32 billion. That’s up nearly $10 billion since 2015.
But here’s the deal. The idea that we should celebrate mothers? Is a great idea. Up until recently, mothers worked the equivalent of a full-time job—cooking, cleaning and raising the kids—without receiving any sort of pay for doing so.
As someone who had a mother (she unfortunately passed away a few years back), and who wants to celebrate and raise up women in general, Mother’s Day can be a difficult time. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I am one of those businesses who profits from the Holiday Industrial Complex, but I also rail against the commercialization of Christmas, Easter, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day….
And I don’t have a great answer. I need to be able to charge for what I do. I want to celebrate women in general and mothers specifically. I want mothers to come and get epic, intimate image, and Mother’s Day is a great time to do so. But I also don’t want to appear to be crass, cashing in on a craze.
I’m not going to be offering any sales or discounts for Mother’s Day. Nor am I going to push you, as a mother, to get photos done, or you, as a mother lover, to get your favourite mother a Beyond Boudoir session. Instead, I am going to post some photos of a handful of the wonderful mothers I have shot over the years. Enjoy.
