Modern Boudoir in a Nutshell

This image was posted in a boudoir photography group that I am a part of.

The very first comment. THE VERY FIRST COMMENT was “if only it were black.”

That’s it. Right there. That’s why I don’t shoot modern “boudoir.” Why I consider what I shoot to be beyond boudoir.

Because so many photographers, instead of seeing what is unique and different—about the setting, about the props, about the outfit…about you—instead try and push everything to their own standards of what is “beautiful” or “appropriate.” They see a hot pink loveseat, and they want to paint it black.

To paraphrase a famous philosopher, Eff that shit. It’s the colour that makes it unique. It’s the colour that makes it special. It’s the colour that sets it apart. To take and dye it black would ruin all that makes it, it.

Last month, I did an epic shoot on top of a mountain with a client who was nervous about the shoot. One of the the things she mentioned to me was that she had done a boudoir shoot before, but didn’t like it. The photographer had taken and put her in their studio, put her in their clothes, and photographed her in the way “all women want to be photographed.”

She found the experience … disconcerting. She didn’t feel seen or celebrated. She felt packaged up and put on display.

If that’s the experience and the outcome you’re looking for, that’s fine. Because while not all women want to be photographed that way, some do. I appreciate that and respect that. My goal is not to reject this box in order to put you in this other box. My goal is to celebrate you. Your uniqueness. Your personality and character. If you are a hot pink love seat in a sea of grey sectionals, I want you to know that you are my client. I understand and accept you. I don’t want to paint you black or grey or even green. I want to capture you.

Or maybe you are one of those grey sectionals, but secretly, you yearn to discover your true colour. You are my client, too.

My goal is not to paint you grey. Or even hot pink. My goal is to see you, and to capture you. You as you are. You as you want to be. You as you are seen by the people who love you. The best and most wonderful you. Maybe even the aspirational you. My goal is NOT to take and shove you into my definition of what is beautiful and show you that.

Eff that shit.